Holy Crap, I have to give birth to this baby...

Yes, this is how I'm feeling this morning.  Like someone just hit me over the head with a car seat and the reality of the situation knocked me on my butt.

In this situation, our all-day long birthing class is the hypothetical car-seat-over-the-head.

I think I've been somewhat in denial, or at least just avoiding the idea of actual birth - baby coming out of my body birth.  I think I've always known that one day I would have an inside baby and then something crazy would happen and the next day I would have an outside baby.  I most definitely was not thinking about the logistics of it all.

I have to say, I learned a ton of stuff that I didn't know - which is great.  The labor and delivery nurse that taught the class for our practice was WONDERFUL.  She was knowledgeable, experienced, confident, caring, and completely nuts - my kinda girl.  You could tell she's delivered thousands of babies in her tenure and loved each and every one of them.  She understood the neurosis of a pregnant woman and was able to answer questions without creating more neurosis.

She used a lot of visuals (I am a visual learner) and explained the process of labor in a very safe, non threatening way.  She was not at all in denial about the pain but she just made you feel like in this moment I'll be able to handle it when that day comes.  She talked about epidurals, ways to make yourself relax through contractions, and how not to strangle your husband (also, for husbands how not to get strangled).

Mike and I had difficulty with the breathing techniques - we laughed the entire time, screwed up the directions, and just couldn't take the he-he-he-he-hoo seriously.  I do feel like we have a small bag of tricks for that day - we'll just have to see if we remember them.

I also think it was hard for us not to laugh at the other couples who were in war mode with breathing.  Huddled in corners, serious faces, quiet discussions of the effectiveness of each technique - we're obviously still in denial about actual birth.   Either that or somewhere in my brain, I realize that a few he-he-he-hoo's WILL NOT eliminate the pain.  I'm sure we won't have the giggles in the Labor and Delivery room!

At one point we (the moms) were supposed to communicate to our "coaches" about where the pain is and where they should rub this tennis ball on our back while we're bent over a chair.  (I'm sure some of you just giggled with the visual).  I'm sure on D-Day, I will be VERY good at communicating where it hurts and what I would like my "coach" to do, but in a dark room with yoga music playing and 20 other people, it just makes me giggle.  Insert a few serious couples, and I couldn't hold it together.

She did have us do an interesting exercise with an ice cube.  We had to hold the ice cube in our hands, do the breathing, coaches rubbing our backs for 45 seconds.  The ice was cold, and it hurt, a little.  Then we put the cube in our other hand, not doing the rubbing or the breathing, and the ice cube melted super fast and physically hurt my hand within 15 seconds.  Interesting.

Hands down the best part of the day was a bacon burger, cheese fries, and a vanilla shake at Stanley Burger.  Yum Yum.

We also did a tour of the hospital - which everyone says makes you feel better.  Well I think this was where I had my car-seat-over-the-head moment.  Holy crap, we'll be in one of these rooms trying to squeeze out an 8 lb baby in a mere 5ish weeks.

Not to mention 20 people squished in a room definitely triggered my mild claustrophobia - which doesn't help.

We did learn where Mike should park the car on that fateful day, to ask for a "new" room so we can have a window, a bathroom, and a shower if one's available, and where my parents will be camping for a long stretch of time.  Useful information.  Also, the nurse was great at making sure we understood that this will still be our baby and we really can make a lot of decisions about how things will go after the baby is here.  Comforting.

I just keep trying to remind myself "I will not have control" and "go with the flow." I'm hoping to keep some of my sense of humor about the situation, too.

Weekly poll:

How far along? 35 weeks 1 day, 34 days until my due date

Weight gain: Up 24 total, that's 5 pounds in 2 weeks.  Yikes!

Belly measurement: 42 and 7/8"  up 5/8's of an inch in 2 weeks (so I guess that's why my butt doesn't fit in my maternity jeans anymore... it's not going to the belly)

Stretch marks? I'm not sure if I care anymore

Sleep? Up every hour or so to pee.  And in the mornings, I tend to lay awake and think for a few hours. 

Best moment this week? Nothing exciting happened this week...

Food cravings: Orange juice.  I could drink 5 glasses in the morning.  Not good for heart burn, but still delicious.

Weirdest symptom: Swollen feet/cankles.  Sometimes, they feel like bags of water.  See previous post for photo evidence.

Funny Pregnancy Moment: Me, bent over a chair, in a room full of people he-he-he-hoo'ing while Mike rolled a tennis ball on my back.  I think it'll make me laugh for months!

Labor signs: Nothing yet.  Just hip/pelvic pain, but not bad.

Belly button in or out? In, but definitely outward bound!

Movement? This morning, Mike put his arm around me and felt Ezra's night kicks and he was surprised at how strong they are.  He moves so much more when I'm laying down than during the day.

What I miss? I don't miss anything this week ;)

What I'm looking forward to: After labor and delivery, holding our little baby. 

Weekly wisdom: Take the birthing class, it's worth it - even if it's a little silly

Milestones: Yesterday was 35/35 - 35 weeks, 35 days until due date.

Here's a belly picture: